Remember, I changed the names of everyone in this story. So as I was walking around the school to get in line, I noticed an orange Post-It Note on the floor. It was Captain Pizza’s badge. I considered my options. I could not give it to him, and I could forget this. I could give it to him if he promised to end the war. But he was a friend, and I couldn’t bring myself to do it. “I think you dropped this,” I said as I walked up to him. He thanked me and celebrated. The pizzas were growing stronger, and so were the tacos. Even the teachers were in on this nonsense. Our teacher was a taco, the teacher across from our classroom was a taco, and so on. I really wanted this to stop, but I couldn’t help myself. I ended up making an Asian Club, but that went nowhere. The Pizza People had many members leaving to become neutral,and some left for the Talking Tacos. It was outdoor recess, and I think mother nature was mad at us for making such nonsense, because it was really windy. Not normal windy day. Super windy. Someone almost had to go to the clinic because the wind pushed them into a pole. A few kids were hiding behind a building. I don’t know why they let it be outdoor recess, because it was like a hurricane out there. Soon I found a good hiding spot and sat there until recess was over. The war didn’t go on for the rest of school, but I know it will come up again soon. To be continued… also, this is all true.
A Tale of Two Groups (and possibly a third or fourth group)
War. That’s what they said. It was the worst of times. A weekday. Recess time. It was indoor recess. I was playing Connect 4 as I always do. I think I’m addicted to Connect 4. Before I tell this story, I’m going to change the names of everyone because why not? So Captain Pizza came and said “You are now a pizza.” Then he stuck a Post-It Note on me. It had an odd looking pizza picture on it. Then Captain Pizza added “You are the Connect 4 Pizza.” Now this may seem small. But that didn’t mean nothing bad would happen. Then Bob asked Rob ” Do you like pizza or tacos?” Rob answered pizza, and he was in the club. Captain Pizza was hard at work, scribbling pizzas on Post-It Notes like he had just eaten a million pounds of sugar. Then I noticed that the club was just hating on tacos. Then Commander Taco, who was on the other side of the room, was saying stuff like ” Captain Pizza copied me,” and “I just made this club for fun.” Now we’re in the “confused” zone. This wasn’t right. That’s where it happened. The Pizza People declared war against the Talking Tacos. But after more classes, the drama was just swept under the blanket. Most people forgot about it. I forgot about it. Until the next day… Now I have to go to bed so bye. Just so you know, this is all true.
A Cat With A Violin Says Hi
There was a cat named Pat who was very fat as he sat on a mat and farted on a rat and wore a hat with a tux and a tie and shoes that were sly and then sat on a chair as he wrestled a bear that ripped out his hair and drove a car very far to a town and drove around in his car and a gold bar when he opens up a book and sits in a nook that he took and stole a jewel and used it as a tool to open up the box of food. Also, a cat with a violin says hi.
How to Live Life: Tips On How to Live Your Life
Have you ever wondered “Do I really have nothing to do with my life?” Well here is how you live life to the least. The greatest tips are here. 1. Get up really early to play some video games. 2. Eat all that junk food. Never eat beans. Remember, you are what you eat. 3. If you are ever cursed, clip off your toenails and burn them as a sacrifice to be cured. 4. Don’t eat Oreos before bed. They are super hard to brush out. 4. I should tell this tip to my brother. DON’T STICK YOUR FINGER IN THE BUTTER TO EAT IT. THE WHOLE FAMILY USES IT. MY BROTHER DOESN’T EVEN WASH HIS HANDS. 5. If you ever decide to eat some fruit, I suggest some grapes or mangoes. 6. I learned that PB and J sucks without the jelly. The jelly slides to the bottom since it can’t stick like peanut butter does. So I suggest holding it for 5 seconds. Then quickly turn it upside down and bite it. You are now the jelly lord! 7. If you want to learn to play piano, you can in ABC. A. Buy a piano. B. Play random notes in a certain order. C. Call it music. 8. Keep a journal. Anything could happen. Like this morning, students were talking about today’s news on the speaker. They said “Welcome guest teachers. Errr… wait, there are no guest teachers.” 9. Have you ever wanted to be on a reality show? Now you can! First, go on some big trip. Next, get in a big argument, the kind where they throw drinking glasses at each other. Then, make a big scene so social media can see it. Lastly, you must repeat this so camera crews think you have an interesting life. 10. Have you ever wanted to advertise something? You can do it without pulling out your wallet. Advertise in the comment section. I hear word travels fast in those parts.
The Best Birthday Ever
You probably read the title and thought I was being an optimist. You might think I’m going to have a good birthday. Well let me tell you, the title is sarcasm. I won’t be having a big party at a laser tag place like Khang did. I won’t have relatives coming to celebrate. If you ask me where I went for my birthday last year, I would say “Nowhere.” If you ask me what I got, I would say “One Cupcake.” So when my birthday rolls around, I don’t get excited about the presents like Christmas. Now that I think of it, we never got up our Christmas Tree this year. We sold it. Then we had Christmas in Arizona. Christmas in hot, sunny, dry weather. I don’t think we celebrate any holidays now. Let’s just change the subject. Tomorrow, I’ll be 10. My age has finally gone to double-digits. In third grade, on my birthday, the only thing I got from the school was a free snack coupon (which of course was used for an ice cream sandwich). They didn’t even sing me happy birthday. Neither did my parents. About a week later, someone else had a birthday. I don’t know if it was a him or a her, but I think it was a her. They sang her happy birthday. When I asked the teacher why she didn’t do the same for me, she told me it was because I didn’t bring in a treat for anyone. So pretty much have to pay people fatty snacks for them to do anything for me. Life is rigged. It’s like a board game. You roll the dice. You get good or bad. The dice is probably rigged too. When you check what number you got, you see a 1. Boom. Your life is ruined. Just like that. Or it can take a while, getting all the wrong numbers, until you hit the space you don’t want. As I’m writing this, a commercial on TV was singing about how good life is. How ironic.
Random Memories
Once again, I have been forced to write. I don’t have anything better to do anyways, I guess. I already watched my Gravity Falls recordings, and the show is over too. I don’t have a topic to write about, so I should just write about random points in my life. I do remember this one time in third grade when we had to do a report on a bug. I chose a moth. I have no idea why. I think I got cursed because of that, because now I’m finding moth balls on all my clothes. Almost everyone else chose the dung beetle. I thought everyone was past their phase of thinking poop was funny. Then there was that time when I got yelled at fake guards. In my school, when you get to fourth grade, you can sign up to be a guard. You pretty much get to yell at people when they’re bad. So when I was in second grade, they had this thing called the Buddy Bench. You just sit on it, and kids can ask you to play with them. No one sits on it. So one day, I sat on it to see how other kids would react. That was the same day the fourth graders were going on the City Hall field trip. That means no guards. So then the third graders, who called themselves “Guards-In-Training” yelled at me for no reason. Isn’t the Buddy Bench made for sitting? My brother Khang says I can be annoying, and that may be true. I kind of annoyed them and made them go away. They never got in trouble. Then when I got to third grade, the teacher said some of us were calling ourselves “Guards-In-Training” and yelled at the whole third grade. This school can really be unfair. One day on my first year at school, there was this kid. He got into a fit for something, and got really angry. He took off his first shoe and threw it somewhere. He took off his other shoe and threw it at me. I was small, so anything that hit me hurt a lot. Even a basketball. So getting hit by that shoe was like getting hit really hard in the chest with a poker stick. Then a few months after that incident, there was a kid that went to the bathroom. While he was in there, the teacher was reading a book. After the first page, we just hear the kid from the bathroom singing. Like, at first I was hearing the teacher reading “The Little Train That Could”. Then I heard “A-B-C-D-E-F-G!”. Everyone was laughing while the teacher tried to calm everyone down. But the kid in the bathroom didn’t stop. “H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O-P!”. So after you read some of my memories from school, I guess you can say my school is weird, unfair, and messed up.
Field Trip
So today I was watching a basketball game with my dad, my older brother named Khang, my younger brother named Bien, and a flying cat with laser eyes. My dad told me to write, so here I am. But before I start, I want to point out that when I was logging in, it said “not secure” at the top. I hope someone fixes that. Never mind that though. Let’s start. Let me start with the field trip. We were going to City Hall on Friday, and the whole fourth grade was going. 3 people from each class would be in the council. In my class, it was Anthony as the mayor, Ian as the councilman, Grace and Salina as the councilwomen. There were other people in the other classes that got picked for clerk and stuff like that. Then there would be three issues to talk about. Each class would have an issue to study. For our class, it was if the city should keep chickens or not. Then everyone, including the jobless people, had to write an essay to explain why you’re against or with the issue. The jobless people’s essays would be checked by the teacher. Don’t ask me what I wrote on my essay, because I don’t have it with me right now. Then Thursday rolled around, and the teacher announced the 4 winners that got to read their essay at the field trip. The teacher started reading off of the winners list. “Mario,” she said. Mario stepped up, grabbed his essay, and sat down. Everyone clapped and cheered. If you were wondering, yes that is really his name. Then the teacher got everyone to quiet down and read the next name. “Nam,” she said. I got up, slightly annoyed because I didn’t want to read an essay I made in front of the whole fourth grade. Most people cheered, and some didn’t, because they knew this process would be repeated another two times. I grabbed my essay and sat down. The teacher read the next name. “Noah,” she announced. As expected, everyone cheered as he grabbed his essay. The last person the teacher announced was Courtney, and everyone became tired of cheering and clapping. Then we practiced and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Blah. So the next day, I had on the reading shirt the teachers asked us to wear at the field trip. They give one to each kid every year. There’s always a cheesy reading phrase on the back that goes along with each year’s theme. Last year, it was a space theme. The shirt said “Reading is out of this world!”. This year, it’s a camping theme. The back of my shirt said “It’s time for s’more reading!”. Yes, all of them have to be cheesy. So yada yada woo woo. Let’s just get to the point. We had to choose a bus partner, and got paired up with a kid named Xander. On the bus ride, we talked, but not much. When we got to the City Hall, the kids got in their places. The first issue was debating if we should have a teen center or not. The council read their essays. The speeches were long, and they really kept you thinking which side to choose. Although their endings were bland. EVERY SINGLE ONE had the same conclusion sentence. Not the exact same, but pretty close. “And this is why I think we should keep a teen center.” “This is why I think we should not have a teen center.” It was killing me. At last, one person said “With no more debate from the council, the issue is open to public. Please state your name and limit your comments to 3 minutes.” So some kids got up with their essays. Of course, the conclusion sentence was killing me. Then the kid spoke again. “The issue is now open to vote. Charity?” Charity said nay. I think. I’m not sure. The kid spoke again. “Luca?” He said “Nay.” This went on until the nays won. “The resolution has failed,” the girl said. So I guess there will be no teen center. The next issue was “Should we wear uniforms to school?”. Again, good speeches mostly, besides the conclusion sentence. The council voted, and no uniforms. Then came the chicken thing. Before you call me an animal hater, let me just say I didn’t really have a choice pick sides with chickens or not. Blah blah, we’ll be keeping chickens, yah yah. Then we got to wander around and eat pizza with water and fruit snacks. After that, we had to get back on the bus and go to the city’s Justice Center. We had a play where a kid named Marko was accused of not doing his homework, and was now at court. His lawyer, another student, did a good job, but in the end, he was guilty. After listening to the witnesses, I pointed out why he was innocent. The other students agreed, but I’m not the lawyer, so I couldn’t do anything if I wanted to. So real police came in and arrested him with real handcuffs, and then threw him into a real holding cell. They let him out later. Then we got to peek inside the holding cell. It smelled really bad. It smelled like a bunch of farts, poop, and pee mixed together. I can’t emphasize enough on how bad it smelled. The was a tiny bench in there, with a tiny toilet mixed with a sink in the corner. We got to leave that holding cell. Then we got on the bus. So that, my friends, was the field trip. See ya.
Teacher In-Service Day
Okay, this should have been posted two seconds ago, but my draft didn’t save. Either I have no idea on how to use this blog, or I didn’t let it save long enough when I gave it to my older brother Khang. So let’s take this a step back. I was writing on this yesterday, when Khang took this from me. I don’t think I gave it time to save before I handed it over. Anyways, because it was Teacher In-Service Day, we had a day off. It should’ve been fun for me, but someone gave away my laptop. If you want to know who, lets just say what I call her starts with m and rhymes with Tom. This does give me a chance to get a new one for my birthday since that laptop was kind of slow. My birthday is only about a month away, so I don’t have to wait long. Enough about the laptop though, let’s get to the point. Once again, dad told me to write about my day off. So after I woke up and brushed my teeth, I read Khang’s book. It must’ve been an hour until I came to my senses and got breakfast. I had a blueberry waffle with a cup of milk. Just to tell you, this post isn’t going to be long. So after a while, when Khang and my younger brother Bien, came downstairs, they had breakfast. After a long time, we played games and did stuff like talk about how many days Bien can go without whining or crying. Around nighttime, a friend named Ryan came over. We played on my Xbox 360. I had a Kinect which just sensors your movements and makes your character do whatever you’re doing. Almost like a VR. We played football with each other on the Kinect. Just if you wanted to know, me and Ryan won. After that, we had some milk. I had chocolate milk, and Ryan had normal milk. Then Bien started crying because he wanted chocolate milk too, but there was no way I was going to get out all the things I needed to make more chocolate milk. Sadly, dad came in and went on Bien’s side, so I had to do all the work. After that mess, me and and Ryan played a baseball game. It was rigged though, because half the time it didn’t swing when you did, and if did swing, it would be three seconds too late. Once again, I needed another snack, so I chose a small bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and chocolate syrup. The baseball game had been a tie, each of us having two points. We played Skylanders Trap Team. We were on the final boss, but all of our Skylanders died. We tried waiting for our Skylanders to revive, but we were taking too long. So we restarted the boss battle. Right when we were about to win, Ryan’s dad made him go home. So that was the end of Skylanders. We played ourselves.
The Life of Me
Today at night, my dad told me to write in here so…here I am. I shall write this eating grapes. Grapes are the perfect mix of solids that fill your stomach and juice that ends your thirst. Enough about grapes though. Dad told me to write about what happened today. So the first thing I did this morning was wake up, obviously. I got up and brushed my teeth. Then I went downstairs, got myself cereal, got my little brother Bien cereal, yadha yadha yadha. I need to note that nothing interesting happened today. I’m not living in a fantasy where I end up fighting dragons and wizards and evil people. Anyways, I changed, got my backpack, and left. I got on my magical floating train and took off. Ha ha. I used a car that my dad was driving to get to school. Let’s fast forward a bit so you don’t have to hear boring details about driving to school. So blah blah. I unloaded at my locker. I put on my gymshirt. I don’t know why we wear an extra shirt at gym. They say that any shirt with your name on it counts as a gymshirt. So every day at gym, we wear an extra layer of clothing. My theory is that the teachers want us to sweat more with the shirts, so when the parents see us, they think we have good physical education from here. Then more people will pay for this school. I’m not sure if this is true, but it could be. So when I got to gym, we did some stretching, some push ups, and jump roping. Then we spent the rest of the time playing floor hockey. When gym was over, I took off my shirt and sniffed it. It smelled horrible. What a waste of a good shirt. We walked back to homeroom, and did some boring math. Then I had a brain cramp. It took me about six tries to figure out what ninety plus twenty-one was. We learned some mind-numbing algebra. Then we did some reading . I wouldn’t call it boring because reading is my favorite subject. I’m gifted in reading. I’m also really close to being gifted in math, but not enough. I wouldn’t like math, even if were gifted in it. So we read this old book called So You Want To Be President?. Then we had to fill in this sheet. I kind of zoned our for about ten seconds. Then it was time for lunch. I had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, an icecream sandwich, chocolate milk, and some fruit. Then I played Connect 4 with a kid named Ethan. The first few matches were a tie. He was pretty good. Then I started winning. I won most of them. The rest were a tie. He didn’t win a single one. Then we went back to class. Some boring language arts writing. Then super boring social studies. Boooooooooorrrriiiiinnnnggg. So then I quickly did my homework while they called dismal. I finished and left. I got picked up by mom in her hovercraft. Just kidding. She picked me up in her hoverbike. Also kidding. She picked me up in something that starts with v and rhymes with can. When I got home, I took out the trash, shot some hoops before going back inside, took a shower, watched TV, ate dinner, and now here I am. So goodnight everybody. And goodbye.
Random Trivia No One Cares About
1. Alaska is the biggest state in America.
2. George Wahington had nine siblings.
3. A goldfish’s memory span is about three seconds.
4. In your future, something will happen.
5. Reading the weird posts I made two years ago can be permanently injure yourself due to the weirdness.
6. Racecar spelled backwards is racecar.
7. Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To have lunch at Fried Chicken Kings.
8. Squirrels can swim.
9. Nine Nine Nine Nine Nine Nine Two Nine Nine Nine.
10. Take off your couch cushions, and you might find a dollar.
11. It can be hazardous to eat yellow snow.
12. Twelve is my favorite number.
13. I don’t want to write on thirteen because I heard it’s an unlucky number.
14. I shall quote this from a friend. “There’s a parasite on inside your arm!” My response was ” That’s my vein.”
15. This is the last useless tidbit.