Subjectively, the best web log on this site is me. Objectively, the best web log on this site is me. Is this any of the other bloggers’ fault? No, it’s not their fault they cannot compare to an absolute master web logger like me. However, even though they are clearly inferior to me, some people attempt to claim that they have the greatest web log on this site. This is absolute blasphemy, nonsense, folderol, and other big words I’ll search up on a thesaurus. Such asinine (another word I found on a thesaurus) claims should be completely disregarded. Unfortunately, some people take this rubbish seriously, which leads me to believe that I am not getting the respect I deserve. I’m famous for my masterful writing, yet no one cares. All of my classmates know who I am. If that doesn’t make you famous, I don’t know what does. Still, a famous person like me keeps getting the worst fate.
Just the other day, I tagged along with my grandmother to the store, mainly to buy snacks and a gift card for the Switch. Before you call me greedy, just know that a world-renowned web logger such as I deserves a lavish lifestyle such as this. When I got home and scratched the back of the card, the worst possible thing happened. I accidentally scratched off the code, which made the card absolutely worthless. To add insult to injury, I had used my own money to buy it. Absolutely preposterous. How can a first-rate web logger like me be allowed to fall into such a cruel fate as this. It’s all terrible. My life is terrible.
Which is great, because it would make a great story. I can see it now, Cool and Skillful Master Web Logger’s Woeful Tale of Tragedy. In fact, this is what I’m titling my next book.